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Worst Week at Work

On Monday, I tell my principal I am pregnant (yay!! 1st child!!) and need to leave early Tuesday for an ultrasound.

On Tuesday, my husband and I see our little zygote with its heart beating and it is one of the most transcendent moments of my life.

On Wednesday, the principal calls me into her office, tells me she's replacing me in the Media Center b/c she doesn't think I run a strong media program, and she wanted to replace me back in January 2013 when she took over the school...even though this woman has given me the highest rating possible 2 years running, and I was nominated for Teacher of the Year this year. Instead of working in the library field (of which I have a Master's in and  7 years experience), she's putting me in a classroom next year.

On Thursday, I make some phone calls, attempting to find another position in the county, worrying that maybe I am a horrible Media Specialist.

On Friday, around 1:30, I begin cramping badly. I get to the front office to see the nurse, when I begin to miscarry in the clinic. I am taken to the hospital in an ambulance, where my husband meets me, and we are told the ultrasound shows nothing, I have miscarried completely.

I go home, getting a couple phone calls from coworkers to check on me.

The principal does not show her face while I am in the clinic or the hospital; doesn't call me to check, makes no effort to communicate.

I recover for 3 days at home, and now, am about to go back to that school.

I have to get out of that school. That woman is pure poison.

Comments

( 36 comments — Leave a comment )
toliver
May. 6th, 2014 11:54 am (UTC)
I am so sorry that happened. Yes, you need to find a new position somewhere else. Look at the public library too for positions as a Children's Librarian. Good luck.
theidolhands
May. 6th, 2014 12:42 pm (UTC)
Agreed. I can't help wondering though if some sort of legal action, even a small one or a well-placed grievance is possible, this just smacks of illegal behavior to me and of course it could've put undue stress on the mother. I'm concerned about this sort of behavior going unchecked and leading to the next person suffering.

I'm not telling OP to take it to the point of a lawsuit, but I honest-to-goodness knew a woman who miscarried far further along in pregnancy, due to job stress, that put forth a suit and won.

hazelnut96, please at least speak to a lawyer or two, empower yourself; I just don't trust someone who would do this to you to be trustworthy as you search for employment elsewhere either; it couldn't hurt to know you have some backing or law on your side, which might be the only thing that will keep her from ruining your life or career again. You want to know exactly what you should and should not be saying. My most sincere wishes for better fortune and please keep us updated.

Edited at 2014-05-06 12:54 pm (UTC)
bunnyjadwiga
May. 6th, 2014 03:14 pm (UTC)
Yes, I agree. When someone announces that they are pregnant, only a VERY stupid supervisor would suddenly change their job assignment that very week.
snuck
May. 7th, 2014 01:11 am (UTC)
I agree... that changing the job assignment that week was not a good idea. What I would want to know is why it took the principal so long to change it, and whether any other job re assignments went out that same week - because if the principal did ALL the other assignments that week then it was just horrid timing?

I doubt there's recourse for a legal compensation though.

OP ... I'm sorry for your loss :(
lizzybabe17
May. 6th, 2014 03:26 pm (UTC)
Agree with this completely. The principal's behavior is very shady to me.
aisling178
May. 6th, 2014 12:44 pm (UTC)
I'm so sorry for your loss.
l_o_lostshadows
May. 6th, 2014 01:19 pm (UTC)
I'm so sorry for your loss.
wagrobanite
May. 6th, 2014 02:13 pm (UTC)
I'm so sorry for your loss.
hazelstitch
May. 6th, 2014 02:31 pm (UTC)
I am so sorry for your loss.
mstatertot
May. 6th, 2014 03:09 pm (UTC)
I am so sorry for your loss.
bunnyjadwiga
May. 6th, 2014 03:13 pm (UTC)
Offers you sympathy for your loss.

Yes, get away from the principal.
lizzybabe17
May. 6th, 2014 03:28 pm (UTC)
How awful. So, so sorry for your loss. I can't even imagine the thoughts running through your mind having to deal with this tragedy and your callous, insensitive principal as well. Please take care of yourself, stress like this can be a killer.I hope you can find another job soon.
epeeblade
May. 6th, 2014 04:12 pm (UTC)
I am so sorry for your loss.
delphia2000
May. 6th, 2014 04:34 pm (UTC)
Sorry to hear this. I do agree that some legal backing might be in order. Your boss's timing says a lot.
clementine123
May. 6th, 2014 05:41 pm (UTC)
I am so sorry for your loss.

I wish you all the best in your job search. Hugs.
autumnfire1414
May. 6th, 2014 05:47 pm (UTC)
That is not the worst week at school, that is one of the worst times of your life and I am so, so very sorry this happened to you! Please take care of yourself and allow yourself to grieve. It goes beyond suckage that you have to deal with this insensitive boss on top of your tragedy.

If I take a cold, hard look at just the facts how can the principal say that she doesn't think you run a strong media program when she's given you the highest ratings for the past 2 years? Something is rotten in Denmark! This is a very good reason for you to contest it based on the fact that if there was a problem, it should have been reflected in your ratings and performance review. It wasn't, and now suddenly you're not good enough? No. No, no, no. Contest, protest, and [professionally] raise hell. We're on TeamYOU!
lurkerwisp
May. 6th, 2014 05:57 pm (UTC)
I wish you the best.
beadylady
May. 6th, 2014 06:28 pm (UTC)
I'm so very sorry. Sending hugs.
ordinaryfool
May. 6th, 2014 06:52 pm (UTC)
I am so very, very sorry. I wish you the best of luck in finding a new school.

In the meantime, take more time off if you can. You need to take care of yourself to grieve. Ask coworkers you trust for support. If your principal has done things like this to others, ask them to come with you to speak with your superintendent. Maybe if enough of you come forward, something can be done.
theidolhands
May. 6th, 2014 07:38 pm (UTC)
Good suggestions!
serendipity
May. 6th, 2014 07:00 pm (UTC)
From a complete high to a devastating low, I'm very sorry. Please take care of yourself first and don't let that principal further impact your life, she's definitely toxic.
unstricken
May. 6th, 2014 08:08 pm (UTC)
Oh, a miscarriage is so hard. Don't feel you have to pick up and move on right away (someone else said "take time to grieve" and that is excellent advice).

BTW, your supervisor sounds both toxic and stupid. Any lawyer would salivate over the scenario you described.

Peace.
kadymae
May. 6th, 2014 08:21 pm (UTC)
{{{{{{{hazelnut96}}}}}}

How completely awful for you (and your hubby) on every level.

Rest and be well.
libwitch
May. 6th, 2014 09:10 pm (UTC)
I am sorry for your loss.

(but I am with others. I report the conversation that you had with her after you reported your pregnancy -- if you have a teachers union, at least start there. That is very shady behavior to promptly announce removal of your position as something that has been in the works (that is such a cover-their-ass-move) without being able to provide documentation for proving it.)
full_metal_ox
May. 6th, 2014 09:43 pm (UTC)
Hugs (or whatever gesture of sympathy would be within your comfort zone.)

To reiterate what so many others have said: get the hell out of Dodge and find a system prepared to treat you like a human being!
globalkat
May. 7th, 2014 03:05 am (UTC)
So sorry for your loss. As others have said, when you feel up to it go to your union and/or get a lawyer - your principal sounds like a nut job.

But most importantly, take care of yourself.
twilight33
May. 7th, 2014 03:22 am (UTC)
Oh how heartbreaking, I am so sorry for your loss and agree with the others to give yourself the time you and your husband need to process this first. I hope you have an employee assistance plan (EAP) or the like to help with this, the union or HR will have the details - and possibly legal referrals as well.
sarcasticah
May. 7th, 2014 04:08 am (UTC)
I'm so sorry for your loss.
nebroadwe
May. 7th, 2014 01:02 pm (UTC)
My condolences to you and your family. :-(
silveradept
May. 7th, 2014 03:27 pm (UTC)
Our sympathies for your loss.

When you have time, though, that principal needs to be taken to the mat over their behavior. Preferably with the union leading the charge.
kageygirl
May. 7th, 2014 08:50 pm (UTC)
I am so sorry for your loss.
missbadexample
May. 8th, 2014 04:43 pm (UTC)
I am sorry things suck for you right now.
enygmatic1
May. 10th, 2014 12:47 am (UTC)
I am so terribly sorry about your loss and everything else.
kryptonwizard
May. 10th, 2014 06:53 pm (UTC)
I'm sorry to hear that this happened. I hope that you are able to find something better soon..
hazelnut96
May. 11th, 2014 01:22 pm (UTC)
Update--since returning to work, my principal has not met my gaze, made eye contact with me, and has turned and walked directly away from me if I am the only one in the near vicinity.
tesslibtech
May. 12th, 2014 04:52 am (UTC)
So sorry for your loss.
( 36 comments — Leave a comment )

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